BUBBLE 11 – MY EXHAUSTIVE AND CONFUSING ANXIETY

Bismillah Hir Rahman ir Raheem

Hey, guys!! It’s been a long time since I have posted a blog. Mainly because A-Levels is getting very busy & intense. Everytime I think about writing a blog post after I’m done with schoolwork, I either fall asleep WAY before bedtime or I’m not sure what to write about. Now that I’m on a bus travelling across chartered land, I’d like to tell you guys about a weird experience I had last week.

So last weekend from Friday to Sunday, we had a sports event in our school. Many students from schools all across our city and neighboring cities took part in the event, representing their schools. We had been preparing for this for weeks since Eid ul Azha. I was in my school basketball team but I was also an event head of chess along with two other boys from my school. Before the event started, all the event heads had to take trials from students interested in being part of the home team of their respective sport. For a while, I was confused because I was wondering “How do you take trials of chess? Doesn’t a game of chess take an hour minimum to play? & What are we supposed to assess, the number & type of pieces eliminated? Because that doesn’t count because the game depends on which king dies.”

Initially I was working alone but then I just blurted out to my fellow event heads “What are we supposed to test?” But they both handled it. They’re both good at chess and play chess at different school events. They both held the trials. But I felt so dumb and helpless that I couldn’t take the trials. It made me feel as if I was deliberately being dumb to avoid responsibility when I wasn’t. I felt like the extra useless baggage my fellow event heads had to carry around. 

Then it was time to make the fixtures. A couple of boys from different schools registered for chess. But there were no girls. So we decided to include only girls from our school so our students could get free gold and silver medal ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ 4 girls, my friends, took part in it. I had to take part too so that there won’t be trouble with the fixtures and because they had such faith in me that i would get a medal……oh how i proved them wrong ๐Ÿ˜‚

But as much as I tried, I wasn’t able to understand how to make the fixtures. My fellow event heads were talking about doing ‘knockout’ or ‘swiss chess’  or some chess that starts with an R. My head was spinning. I didn’t know what those even meant. That made me feel even more dumb & helpless. And after a couple of matches, whenever I would check the progress, I would always forget who won which match or who lost it everytime! So when someone from the executive council would ask about the progress, I’d say “Ask my fellow event head _____”

Now the event. It started at 7am. The teams started coming at around 8am. Once they gathered, there was a march pass in which the entire management team had to individually lead each team from different schools around the main ground. Then we had to allign them for the national anthem and torch lighting. Then our work began.

It was our job to referee the chess matches that were being held in our school library. But of course, its an event and life is unpredictable and almost nothing goes as planned. The night before the event, two more names had been added to the chess so they had to be adjusted. Then in the afternoon after Jumma prayer, around 8 boys popped up claiming that they had registered up for chess but in actual they weren’t on the list. I was managing the girls’ matches so my fellow event heads had to deal with it. They were irritated at first but then they were calm, confirmed their registration and adjusted them. Once again, something I’m not sure I could’ve done.

But here’s the funny part. A week before the event, we gave a list of the items we needed i.e. 6 chess boards and 6 chess clocks. And guess what happened?! Come on, guess! There are so many infinite possibilities of what could happen.

.

.

What happened was that we received 2 chess boards of low quality, a chess board printed on a bloody lafafa (plastic bag) & no chess clocks!! It was ridiculous! Registrations and Logistics departments had caused us so much problems. Even the IT department didn’t give us all our tags.

 We used the two chess boards & tried using the lafafa chess board but it was too ridiculous and we couldn’t help laughing so much. Plus, the chess pieces and the lafafa kept flying off. We somehow found a leather chess board which we used. But one participant came and when he saw the situation, he said he had a leather chess board and a clock with him ๐Ÿ˜‹ now what could be more disgraceful than that? My fellow event head would, whenever the opportunity came, pull out the lafafa chess board and show it to his friends, our sports teacher, our admin, even our principal. I think if you’ll ask him at any point in the future about it, he’ll bring it out of his pocket and flash it in your face within a millisecond and tell you exactly what happened ๐Ÿ˜

As for the clocks, we used my fellow event heads’ phones, downloaded the chess clock apps and used them. I downloaded it on my phone but it was too confusing so I had to use theirs. I used mine later. But think about it; our school apparently couldn’t get clocks! & What if in between the match, our phones rang? Would we have told them to pause, close their eyes and stop thinking?

We somehow managed it and were done by the third day. But since I’m relating this event to my bubble, I want to tell you what I experienced in the first day of the event. I overslept, didn’t have breakfast and was constantly working till 7pm that day. Yet when I look back, I didn’t do as much work as my fellow event heads did. They held trials, made fixtures, handled the new participants and yet were calm, composed and active. Whereas by the time of Jumma, I was already drained. & I only moved around in an air-conditioned library! By the midway, I couldn’t focus on the matches. The girls playing were telling themselves at some occasions when it was a foul move or check. 

I’ve been trying to understand why I was feeling so tired at that time. Then I thought; i was feeling anxious often that I wasn’t doing enough, that others were doing more than me, that I would be kicked out of the management. These thoughts made my heart race & my concentration distorted. All my energy was used up in maintaining this anxiety. I barely ate that day. I only had coffee which my friend brought and a shawarma which my fellow event head had bought for me. Everyone seemed to notice I was drained. But my fellow event heads acknowledged that I did hard work even though I don’t feel like I did. But atleast it gave me some comfort. Though I cried after the second day.

On the second day, my fellow event head managed to get clocks so we weren’t that disgraced. 

The third day was the closing ceremony and another wonderful thing happened. The medals for chess were not made, along with tug of war and futsal! The girls who won were annoyed and were afraid of going on stage when they wouldn’t even get the medal. My fellow event heads had a greater problem because the winners from boys were from different schools and it was disgraceful to tell them they wouldn’t get the medals. But we had to deal with it. (now its been a week since the event and we’re still demanding to get the medals but they say they’ll get it ‘tomorrow’ ugghhh ๐Ÿ˜ฃ๐Ÿ˜ฃ๐Ÿ˜ฃ)

The closing ceremony was ok. 90% of the people were barely paying attention and midway of the ceremony, they went for the food a.k.a sandwiches, chicken patties and cupcakes. But I was happy to get free mint margheritas ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

                          ………………

What I meant to say in this blog post is that whenever I take up a big responsibility, I tend to get confused which makes me anxious which makes me exhausted which deceives me into thinking that I have worked hard whereas that is not entirely true. I would appreciate it if you all could give me some advice as to what I can do to combat this anxiety. I am a hardworking student but I want to be good in other things as well. Organising work requires a different type of skill. I want to be a leader. I want to have full confidence in myself. I want to be firm and yet not be rude to people and I want others to build me up rather than break me down. One of my fellow even heads and I will be working together in logistics of a science event in our school soon so I really need these qualities in me.

I am so grateful Alhamdulillah that my fellow event heads never brought me down but considered me their equal and we helped each other out. I spent most of the event in the library with them and had a great and fun tine with them ๐Ÿ˜

P.s I’m already tearing up while writing this.

P.P.S I’ll see if I can find the lafafa chess board again. If I do, I’ll add it in this blog ๐Ÿ˜œ
Allah Hafiz ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

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BUBBLE 10 – ASHRAF AL MAKHLUKAAT – THE BEST OF CREATIONS

BISMILLAH HIR RAHMAN IR RAHIM

We have all been created by Allah. Every tree, every flower, the wind, the rivers and streams, the mountains and the beach, every species in their most perfect and complex manner. Then He created us and made us the Best of all Creations. Ashraf al Makhlukaat is an Arabic phrase.

But as I live my life. As I see people around me, as I look into my mind and my heart and see myself….I feel that this phrase is completely opposite of what we are.

Before Allah sent us His Books and guided us, and in between those time periods, people were engaged in the most heinous of crimes. Murder, theft, warfare, torture, slavery, rape, marriages between sons and mothers, burying baby daughters alive….all this used to happen. Even animals were more learned and sane than us. Ants can build a home and move in straight lines, whereas we can hardly even make a proper line when we are impatient. But when they received guidance, they evolved into our greater selves. They became aware of their faults and weaknesses and grew stronger in mentality and intellect. They believed no doubt in their purpose to serve Allah.

But after all the prophets passed away, many killed by disbelievers, people lost their way again. They returned to their old traditions and cultures and robbed each other of their rights.

Now look around. Not a day passes where you don’t hear about violence, rebellion, rape, killing in the name of ‘honour’, kidnapping and corruption. At some point in time, people started caring only for what they want. Every act of their daily routine was focused on serving themselves. Earning for themselves, spending on themselves, littering outside their house because “the garbage bins are not visible”, lying and cheating others for their own benefit, getting in trouble and putting the blame on others, making friends to fulfill their own purposes, backbiting, suspicion, making fun of others and expressing our judgments and stereotypes without thought….it is so unnatural and inhumane yet so common and expecting.

We have even neglected our own environment. Global warming is effecting us and the world at such a great level. I can barely even sit in my house sometimes without sweating so much and taking a bath three times a day. We have polluted our beautiful earth of its grace while searching for resources. Ice caps are melting, animals are becoming extinct….it is true what is said about the show of Scooby Doo: you learn that the real monsters are actually people.

Now people are buying houses in Mars! The arrogance! Do they want to destroy another planet? Whatever you take, you have to give back something in return. No. We deserve to stay here and pay for our crimes. We can run to the furthest planet in the galaxy but we cannot run from Allah when we will return to Him.

Now massacres are becoming often heard of as well. Palestine, Afghanistan, Burma,etc. Many lives are lost due to feuds between governments. Wars should be avoided at every cost but if it takes place, it should remain in the battlefield. Wildlife, vegetation, men, women and children not part of the battle should not even feel an inch of pain because of it. Yet millions of innocents are targetted. Who knew even being innocent became a crime? It’s like innocent people don’t deserve to live on this earth.

I look at myself, and I often see the same filth. I have made countless mistakes in my life, known and unknown, which I have no idea will ever be removed from my record of deeds. It’s like I think so much about my decisions and I fully support it, I give all my efforts in accomplishing it but its consequences don’t always turn out the way I expect them too. What keeps me going on is my faith in Allah, His Love, His Mercy, my fear of Him and His Guidance. Without that, I would have even killed myself if I had reached that point due to guilt. Even the tiniest of mistakes such as forgetting to send money to someone, the dough being wasted because it doesn’t rise or even killing my favorite character in a PS4 game make me rethink of my stupidity. I am often called ‘Tubelight’ by my family. I laugh about it but nowadays, it has never been more true. I try to be an honest person but I’m surprised often that people even trust me.

All these thoughts revolve in my head when I watch the news. We are the worst thing that has ever happened to this world. Every action we do has sensitive consequences. Words spoken cannot be taken back.

But then I remember an ayat from Surah Baqarah in the Holy Quran. In the ayat, Allah had said that He planned to create a new being; Man, for His worship. But the angels who are constantly in His Service and Worship told Him:

“How can you create something who would cause chaos and shed blood whereas we glorify Your Praises all the time?”

To that, Allah simply replied:

“I know that which you do not.”

Once they heard that, they bowed towards Hazrat Adam(A.S) when commanded.

This got me thinking, that though humans seem like the worst beings in the world, they have a tremendous potential for good. Our prophets were humans too so we are capable of following their example. They hold charities and organisations to serve the needs of people foreign and domestic. They care for their family, friends and neighbors. They treat their guests well. They stand against evil and infidelity. They forgive others and hold no grudges no matter how much pain people cause them. They are confident, vigilant, brave and honourable. They are concerned about worldly and internal issues. They are constantly in the quest for knowledge. If they even unintentionally prick another with a needle, they feel as if they were stabbed by a thousand needles. They ask for forgiveness and make amends with their enemies. They protect and nurture each other. They are like animals; constantly working in a fixed and just system that does not harm others. Always in the effort to do things the right way. And there is more to us that only Allah knows.

So if you think that you are the worst person or have made many mistakes, know that Allah created you for a reason. He knew what man was capable of when He created him. You are capable of more than you know. You make one mistake, you can fulfill it with ten good deeds. If you even repent wholeheartedly, it will be counted as your good deed. We are Ashraf al Makhlukaat because we have the willpower to do great. We have to freedom to do as we wish. Let us all work to be worthy of this title and help others achieve it as well. Let us end evil or harmful acts where we see it. And may Allah help us in this constant effort.

Ameen ๐Ÿ˜Š

Peace out โœŒโœŒ

BUBBLE 9 – JUSTICE WILL PREVAIL

BISMILLAH HIR RAHMAN IR RAHIM

Assalam Alaikum, my fellow bloggers. I want to talk about yesterday crucial and memorable event that took place here yesterday in Pakistan. Frankly, I have no interest in politics, mainly because I can’t understand whats going on, as I mentioned in my first blog post, My Bubble of Thoughts. Who supports what, who’s against who, who wants what and how much of what, justice here, corruption there, developments here, lies there, truths locked up. Its quite confusing. But there’s one thing I know; justice only comes once you give your everything and everything into it. Your blood, sweat, tears and all the comforts of life into it.

Now hears the fancy news: This dude here, Mian Muhammad Nawaz Sharif, has been disqualified from his position as Prime Minister.

Our history proved his incompetence to such a level. Making laws only to benefit himself, building a Metro bus system in Lahore and now in Islamabad to provide “cheap travel of Rs. 20 only” but paying for the rest of the costs with our increase in tax, preventing the army chief’s plane from landing so that he could replace him with a buddy of his own in 1999, for which he was exiled to Saudi Arabia. You may wonder how he was chosen as PM? Well thats a long story summed up in a few words: some people are just plain idiots.

For years, he has been stealing money from his people in the name of progress. Many did not rebel against him because they indulge in the same practices as him. But not the man who came to our rescue, Imran Khan.

Former Cricketer and Leader of the Pakistani Party, Pakistan Tehreek-i-Insaaf, and leader of the Opposition Party in Parliament, Imran Khan has fought valiantly for years condemning Nawaz Sharif’s practices. Many were criticising him so much , even at the cost of his own comfort. He has had trouble in his personal matters, having two ex-wives, but its personal and no person’s personal information should be broadcasted for the world to see without their permission.

But he never backed down an inch. His strength, determination and leadership qualities in his cricket days proved so now. In around the mid of 2014, he gathered his followers from Peshawar to Islamabad in front of the Parliament House and held the infamous “Dharna” (protest) there where people gathered everyday at night, united in the fight of injustice. A separate section was made for women and children even and we would come almost everyday to the Dharna (mainly my mom dragging me in the middle of the night ๐Ÿ˜ )

And the legendary chant “Go Nawaz Go” echoed all across Islamabad.

You may think Imran Khan may have been causing chaos only by the Dharna but the Dharna was the means to make our nation aware of the injustice it was experiencing. That made us more united and supportive than ever. 

The Dharna went on for many months but he had to stop it due to the distressing event of APS terrorist attack in Peshawar where around 200 students and staff were murdered, along with the Principal of the school. You can see the level of respect and decency in him. Others would have continued on. Even recently in 2016 he held a Dharna to make the Supreme Court make an inquiry into his acts or he would take harsh means. When Supreme Court agreed, he immediately stopped the Dharna. This shows his only aim was to fulfill the rights of his people, not to show off his greatness.

Then Allah’s help came through the Panama Papers, showing corruption in Nawaz Sharif’s childrens companies abroad. Nawaz Sharif emphasised on the point that the case was about his children, not him. But the important question was, where did the money for these companies come up? Pressure was put on Nawaz Sharif to own up but he refused. People would have given up on it and forgotten it but Imran Khan carried on for a year more of struggle until it encouraged the Supreme Court and the JIT to take up his case.

Nawaz Sharif, his children and his party followers instead of proving Sharif’s innocence, were yelling at the JIT to focus on other people’s properties such as Imran Khan’s house in Bani Gala. And so, they were unable to tell the money trail of the companies.

In the end, the judges made their decision and on 11:30am at 28th July, 2017, declared our PM as Na-ehal! i.e unjust and not Sadiq & Amin i.e truthful and trustworthy. Now thats a stamp no one can remove. Though his last name is Sharif i.e innocent, he is definitely not so.

It was truly a joyous, people were celebrating and dancing on the streets with hope and liberation in their hearts. Even Jemima Khan, Imran Khan’s first ex-wife, showed great support you don’t see many ex-wives doing. She supported him when allegations were put on him and tweeted “Gone Nawaz Gone”

Though this is not the end of corruption but it is a statement to all those corrupt leaders in Pakistan that you will not get away with it. We will find you, we will catch you & you will suffer. Imran Khan will stand up to them and many more Imran Khans will rise. And Inshallah, with Allah’s Grace, we will create the Islamic Republic of Pakistan our forefathers slaved and died to give us. Let us be worthy of their hard work. And let this be an example to anyone in any country where corruption and injustice reigns. Once you take a stand, take a stand with all your might, even if you stand alone.

May God be with you all ๐Ÿ˜Š

P.S this will probably my last post about politics. I guess cuz i could actually write something about it. Usually i’m just blank

BUBBLE 8 – ASSASSIN’S CREED

Hey, guys!! Has anyone played this game? Because the only people I know who’ve played it are my siblings and a close friend. But it gets boring when you want to talk about it with your other friends who don’t know about it so I was wondering if you guys have played it. P.S. it is soo awesome & kool!!

For those of you who don’t know, Assassin’s Creed is an Xbox & PS4 game (though part 1 is played on the computer). It is about the generations long clash between two creeds, the Assassins and the Templars. The Templars search for means to conquer and gain power over the world whereas the Assassins try to take the power from them but not use them themselves; they work in the dark to serve the light. In the current day, the Templars and Assassins try to use the DNA of assassins to trace back to the lives of their ancestors to find the pieces of Eden such as the Apple of Eden. The Templars operate in the company known as Abstergo. 

We are first introduced to Abstergo along with the patient, Desmond Miles, who is an Assassin. Desmond is taken to the Animus which allows them to trace his DNA back to his ancestors.

The first 2 parts were great, especially the second part which takes place in Italy with the story revolving around the Assassin, Ezio Auditore. His story is great and how they show it is even better. The next part I really liked is part 4 – Black Flag where the story revolves around Edward Kenway, a pirate. You can actually sail your ship across the sea. And Blackbeard is your BFF!! The next part I liked is the recent part, Assassin’s Creed 7 – Syndicate where the story revolves around the Frye twins๏ผŒJacob & Evie. I recently finished the game. The story is great & i’m glad we can use a female assassin but it had no climax, no shockers like the previous parts.

A couple of things I really like about the show is the graphics. The streets, the market, the people, the flowers, the trees, the buildings and monuments are made so perfectly. You can visit many main monuments such as the Colloseum, the Tower of London, Buckingham Place, The Vatican, The Eifel Tower and much more. It’s like being there yourself.

Another thing is that you can meet all the famous historic figures such as the Maharaja of Punjab in the 19th century, Blackbeard as I mentioned, Leonardo DaVinci, the Medici Family, Cesare, Machiavelli, George Washington, Benjamin Franklin, Karl Marx, Charles Dickens, Charles Darwin and Karl Marx. The Assassins always have an association with these figures. They are usually their allies.

But, as the name of the game states, the Assassins strive for peace with a blade only. Their only objectives are targets to eliminate. This comes in their motto:

NOTHING IS TRUE, EVERYTHING IS PERMITTED

In the real world, of course, this is not justifiable. You can’t murder a corrupt politician and say you are doing justice. You can’t eliminate big lethal figures and say you are serving the people. Criminals are brought to court of law where their fate is decided. They cannot be killed before that. I play the game mainly for the story, the graphics and the famous people I see (though killing is sometimes fun though, especially with stealth ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ )

So do try it out. If you wish to try out only one game among the series, I’d prefer Part 2 or Part 4 – Black Flag ๐Ÿ˜

Peace out โœŒโœŒโœŒ

BUBBLE 7/ 2 DELVING INTO THE PSYCHE

Psychology is everywhere. How we imitate our elders or characters on television whom we consider role models, how our mind develops mechanisms to prevent ourselves from showing our weaknesses, how you can give someone a label and suddenly thatโ€™s how they are defined, how illnesses such as anxiety and depression are common, how traumatic events effect your mental health; itโ€™s everywhere. The fact that many questions I ask are answered by psychology is intriguing. As much as I feel, The Quran expresses a lot of cognitive psychology, telling mankind not to despair, to be hopeful and that the world is a test in order to strengthen you. There was an ayat saying:

โ€œPerhaps you like something that is bad for you and you hate something that is good for youโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€

Another main reason for liking psychology is my mother. Sheโ€™s taking a diploma course on psychotherapy and also conducts therapy sessions on clients. She tells us about her clients and their and her experiences. It was like wearing spectacles and seeing what was not in front of me. There are so many people going through mental issues and troubles, engaging in drugs, fighting and resenting families, having relationships only to fulfill their desires, expressing abnormal aggression and anger and more. And many of these people would be from rich families! Thatโ€™s what surprised me a lot. So I saw a whole new reality and I wanted to know more about them and help them, because these are things that cannot be seen easily seen. A druggie could be a druggie due to absence of parental figure. A person who forces a smile on his or her face could be crying themselves to sleep and plotting their suicide. You can easily diagnose and treat a leg pain but perhaps not a depressive patient unless they show up for help. The human mind is a very marvelous and a complex system, yet it can easily be shattered and no one will realize it.

By the way, what do you think is the most difficult job in the world? Do leave your answers in the comments below. For me, it is parenting. Think about it; is there a perfect way to raise a child? Anything we do falls short of what we expect and it one way or another effects the child. You give your child freedom and donโ€™t enforce your principles on them & they would spend quality time with you and respect you or they could go wild, doing everything that is wrong. You establish rules and enforce them & they may be brought up disciplined, responsible, spic and span or they may be irritated and resentful and want to run away from you.

Maintaining the perfect balance is not easy. But the best part is our parents try. They always put their blood, sweat and tears to raise us, feed us, clothe us, give us education, knowledge, a life, give us hope, love and respect which is a lot! And I think, if this is not so, the most important thing parents should offer their child is self-realization or self-evaluation. Children should be able to think for themselves. They should know the capacity of right and wrong. If they are lacking in something which is not offered to them by parents, they will search for it themselves. If they face troubles, they will find a way to solve it. Parenting is very hard; my own parents tell me this, as you start becoming a parent when you have a child. You didnโ€™t have parenting experience before that. In addition, children also tend to turn out to be opposite of their parents or one parent. For example, Mama raised my siblings and I but apart from my brother having a couple of traits from Mama, he, my sister and I have almost all the traits of my father. While my mother is sharp and critical, my father is calm, relaxed, patient and content. So yeah, it is difficult to determine the proper style of parenting, though we should love, care, respect and appreciate their parents for all their efforts. May Allah bless all the parents out there in the world and make their jobs easy ๐Ÿ˜

While I was on my Eid trip to Kashmir, as mentioned in the previous blog โ€œOBSERVE, PONDER, BELIEVEโ€, Mama came up with a game for our family. She said one by one, each person was to tell the good traits and bad traits of each person. In that way, weโ€™d know how we all thought of each other. After getting used to the awkward silences of what to say, we managed to share our thoughts openly. It was very interesting and helpful. You all can try it with your families. It may be weird at first but it will help you in having an interactive discussion and to lighten the burden of their thoughts. What we derived from this is that we tend to be more curious about our bad traits rather than our good traits; because you think people are being too modest and are lying just to be caring so you feel like going straight to the point. I have that too, because I tend to hear many compliments about me (not to brag but that happens) but it seems too good to be true and I wish to know where my imperfections lie because I canโ€™t be 100% perfect. I mustโ€™ve done something wrong.

Recently, we played this game with a close friend, excluding Baba and my brother. While discussing all our good and bad points, we began discussing about her life because she has difficulty in her life, especially in college. She feels everyone is judging her, they make wrong assumptions of her, she doesnโ€™t feel properly treated and appreciated, and people in her college are strange and hard to talk to. But Mama would ask her questions like โ€œWhy do you assume they are judging you? They could be complimenting you.โ€ And we were convincing her that if she was worried about what society will say, well then society will always be there. There is no running away from it and she should not bother about what others think. But it was difficult for her. We were giving her tips such as this, especially Mama, but my friend would say that she was so accustomed to being in her zone of being upset and angry that she had gotten used to it. If she ever felt optimistic, she would think something was wrong and pushed it aside. Mama said:

โ€œYou can show the horse the water but you cannot force it to drink it.โ€

To that, she said:

โ€œI know the water is there, but I just wave at it as I pass by.โ€

This conversation was actually funny ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

So I wonder, what can you say to that? Someone who wishes to change yet doesnโ€™t want to change because it is a big risk going into an unknown and uncomfortable territory? In the end, we can only do our best to explain to people what they can do. The rest is up to them whether they do whatโ€™s best for themselves or not. God doesnโ€™t help those who donโ€™t help themselves. But I have faith that she will find a bright light in the darkness and that she does not fear the light. May Allah keep her happy, peaceful and content always.

One thing Mama tells me is that psychology teaches us that we cannot tell people exactly what to do, but we must guide them so that they discover and realize themselves what needs to be done. That is what therapists do. They make sure the client is able to decide himself what needs to be done and that no one will spoon-feed him. If we spoon-feed people, they will either get annoyed that you are involving yourself into their personal matters or they will ask your opinion about every problem they have because they are unable to make decisions themselves.

ย Mama has had experience of the latter, and she says that it is not your duty to save others but just be there for them. I agree to a lot of what she says but we must act in some way to help them when they are troubled. We cannot only be involved in our own lives otherwise that would be selfish. We should help others when we see them in need, give our input and help out. If we feel itโ€™s a lost cause then we must leave them be. But we should make an effort in othersโ€™ lives. Who knows, maybe the person they were waiting to help them is you?

Iโ€™ll sum up this extremely long blog to say that life can bring you down many times. But you are not alone. It is a phase a lot of people go through only to realize their true potential. I feel like by studying subjects such as psychology, sociology, philosophy, etc. we realize our capabilities and study the complex and beautiful specimen of mankind, how they are broken yet wonderful beings, especially our enemies. This can help us create a more inclusive, caring, honorable and united society.

Do share your thoughts about what I said ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • Andale Seaworne out! โœŒ

BUBBLE 7/ 1 – DELVING INTO THE PSYCHE

Bismillah Hir Rahman ir Raheem

Isn’t it weird that when you’re little, you would always have a smile on your face, you’d giggle and laugh and tickle and cuddle and play around all day long. Even in the early teens, you’re like the jolliest person in the whole world. Yet when you start progressing from your late teens, you’re trying to understand what it means to be happy, or if it even is possible to be happy. I didn’t have this experience to an extreme level and for a long time.

This upsetting, depressive and anxious phase of my life was Alhamdulillah only from when I was 16 and a half years old to 17 and a half years old where I was lost and confused and every decision I made seemed to be wrong and would cause problems one way or another, and like I mentioned in my “RAMADAN MUBARAK”ย there was a point where I had to make a decision between two things and they both seemed right yet they both seemed wrong and a wrong decision would turn out to be very bad but I didn’t know which was which (Sorry but I won’t tell exactly what happened, it’s too personal). I would be compared to others sooooooooo much I began to despise my ‘dull and boring’ self.

But during this phase, you find something that gives you comfort, that tells you that all these things are unimportant and will pass away. For people it can be wisdom from a meaningful book, a great companion or friend who shows you the way, some saint who enlightens you. For me, it was Allah. Excuse me if I become too religious too often in my blogs. I normally don’t express it much except with my family, especially Mama, but it’s because I’m not ashamed of it. He found me lost and guided me. When I was searching for answers, He opened the doors for me through the Holy Quran to seek the solutions. Although I am a born Muslim, I feel like I actually converted when I was 16 because that’s when Allah’s importance came into my life. I still had and have trouble making decisions and feel hurt and judged by others but due to Allah being by my side, I understand that everything happens for a reason, that nothing lasts forever and the way we think about our situation effects our current state of mind, not necessarily the situation itself. I merely push the thoughts aside and move on. Thus, I feel happy, content, hopeful and optimistic. Even when people hurt me, even those closest to me, I hold no grudges against them, expect nothing from them and realize that I should put my trust in the One Who created me. I trust those close to me but I am always 500% sure Allah will not break my trust.

 

I recently started having an interest in studying Psychology. Iโ€™ve taken it as my A-Level subject along with sciences. I want to grow up and be a psychologist, Inshallah. The main cause is my surroundings. In our Pakistani society, doing anything new or out of the ordinary is always judged; in dressing, ambitions, beliefs, etc. so having a passion of, say a musician, psychologist, geologist, etc. is frowned upon once they hear about it. People adjust to new concepts but when they first hear it, they’re like, “What’s the point of taking this profession?”

“You will not find a job for this!”

and the legendary statement many of us quote here, which is like the pinnacle of judgement. Like seriously, all other judgmental words, every letter and syllable,bow down to this god of statements. And that is!!! *drum rolls*

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BEHOLD!!:

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“LOG KYA KAHEINGEY?!!” ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  ย Translation: WHAT WILL PEOPLE SAY?!!”

 

A lot of us fall prey to this statement and it makes our lives miserable. This comes in the way of all our passions and almost everywhere in our day to day life. So apparently, anything other than a Doctor,ย Engineer or Lawyer is considered ‘nothing’. Yet when you need expertise for a variety of fields related to something, we have to ‘call international personel’ because ‘we don’t have skilled people here’. I want to break this cycle of thought, like many people do, and expand our horizons of expertise. Our country does not need as much labourers as it needs thinkers because there is a surplus of labour. But we need people to think deeply, to ponder over things, to be inquisitive and develop critical thinking, to understand why things are the way they are, why people are the way they are. We need to be leaders; working under people is easy but we can be manipulated in that way. Philosophy, music, astronomy, etc. are parts of our everyday knowledge we acquire from different sources but why not delve deep into these universes? Be open to the varieties of talent the nation has in store.

Whatever you do, do what you love. Everyone has to work hard in every field. So it is better to work hard at something you enjoy doing. If there is no field, you make a field. If there is no person offering jobs for your field, get the experience and be the boss yourself. People will always judge something they do not understand but in the end, they will be proven wrong. But let’s be careful ourselves not to do the same thing to others because after all, we are part of society nonetheless and if almost everyone experiences it then…………….it’s a weird double-standard situation. We’re all perfectly imperfect so let’s treat others in the way we want to be treated. And let us not judge others by appearances especially. Don’t think someone is bad or good only because of how they look. Looks fade but character endures

P.S this blog is continued in the next one

Peace out ๐Ÿ˜€

BUBBLE 6 – WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE DOES THIS WORLD NEED?

Hey, everyone!!! Hope you are all doing well this blessed Friday. May Allah bless you all and keep you all happy, content and safe ๐Ÿ˜

I want to ask you all a question, my curiosity’s sake ๐Ÿ˜Š My blog title says it:

In your opinion, what kind of people does this world need (profession-wise)? And explain why?

I am looking forward to all of you commenting and giving your interesting input.

HAPPY FRIDAY!! ๐Ÿฅ๐Ÿฅ

BUBBLE 5 – OBSERVE, PONDER, BELIEVE

Sometimes we get so caught up in our busy, messed up, confused and somewhat sad lives that we ignore the many miracles in our life. We become so annoyed by tiny mishaps, hurdles and sudden changes of plan that we ignore the purpose of our entire situation as a whole and realize that it is one big miracle due to all the intense planning and care that is given by Allah. Every detail of our entire anatomy and biology, whatever situations we encounter, the ups and downs in our lives, the people we face and the surroundings we are present in; everything is planned to perfection that if we look at them deeply and critically. Every creation in our surroundings is created in such a beautifully complex design that while studying and knowing so much about them, we are still oblivious to so much about them.

This Eid, I went with my family to a resort in Kashmir called Jhagran Resort. Although it was a long journey of nine hours, all our legs were cramped, we were told every few hours by people on the way that the resort was three hours away, the songs in our USB were โ€˜break-ups relatedโ€™ sad songs ๐Ÿ˜› the road was bumpy and as soon as we reached the resort we slept like weโ€™d never slept in our life, the journey was very beautiful and soothing. In addition, a couple of Coke Studio songs from my motherโ€™s USB allowed us to breathe ๐Ÿ˜›

The road we travelled on after crossing Lower Topa, Murree was always along a plush, green valley overlooking a rushing, gushing River Jhelum whose soothing loud sound would echo all over the valley. Whenever we whined about the long and aching journey, the river and the mountains would always give us comfort. We occasionally stopped along the way just to dip our feet into the icy, cold water. And by icy cold, I mean as cold as your feet being surrounded in a gigantic blob of ice with no place for them to breathe. Exciting, right?! An occasional trip to natural sites in your country or out of your country is essential for you in order to be free from the hustle bustle of the noises of the city.

In addition, it was adorable seeing tiny people walking along the nearly invisible paths along the mountains and my parents, especially my mother, questioning how and why people would bother to live so high up in the mountains, how difficult it must be to transport heavy loads up and down the mountain and whether their living there is due to them not having enough wealth to move into the city and seek good employment elsewhere. These are a lot of questions but I just think to myself, โ€œSure, it is true but who knows? Maybe they enjoy the peace and are content with the calmness emitted from the mountains. Maybe the city life is too uncomfortable from them. Arenโ€™t many health issues in urban areas due to extensive pollution common in those areas? If I lived in the mountains perhaps I would enjoy its serenity, running along the hills, playing along the river, climbing to the top and grow some muscles in my legs instead of fat, and focus on nature rather than my electronic devices. In the end, Allah knows what these people go through and whether they enjoy it or not. May Allah bless them all in either situations.โ€

As we travelled onwards, River Neelum became our companion similar to Jhelum and followed us to Jhagran. Our stay there was wonderful, Alhamdulillah. Accommodation was not perfect but it was at a glorious location. When you looked at the West and the East of the resort, you could see two mountains folding together and then one mountain folding after the other in a continuous pattern. The clouds would either reveal clear blue skies or would create a woolen layer over the sky and release refreshing rain all over us. On the first day of Eid, it rained quite a lot.

As I describe my trip to Kashmir, I highlight an important aspect. Whenever you enter a point in your life where you think God has abandoned you or God is dead ( Na Aazubillah) because you donโ€™t see your life improving in any way, or that when you hear about Islam and think that if God split the ocean to let Hazrat Musa (A.S) to pass through, if He made the fire cold when Hazrat Ibrahim (A.S) was thrown into it, then why can He not show similar phenomena to you as well?

Well then this is where you are not thankful. Think about it, if you were told to free a large army of slaves and wait by the ocean for Allahโ€™s command to create a path for you, would you be able to do it? If you were spending dear time with your son and you were ordered to slaughter him, would you be able to do so? If you were orphaned at a young age, beaten up and stoned so much that your shoes would be full of blood, lost your wife, uncle, grandfather, sons and a few daughters whom you loved dearly, would you still be able to exercise extreme patience, persevere, kindness, generosity, fairness and tolerance in the most perfect manner?

These prophets were given the harshest of trials, ones which we are unable to perform within our capacity to those who were able to face them with courage and vigor. Whereas we are tested at a much lower than these beloved prophets yet we still complain that it is too much. When something doesnโ€™t go in our favor, we scream about it to others and we beat ourselves up thinking that the world has ended and God is absent. If youโ€™re looking for miracles then open your eyes! Isnโ€™t everything in the world, every atom of creation, a miracle in itself?

The seven Heavens and the earth were created by Allah alone. All the beauty that you see on earth, the plush green hills and the gushing rivers I saw on my trip, the cool breeze that pushes away the heat, the many kind of colourful trees, animals, flowers you see in the worldโ€ฆ..were these created by ordinary men? Can men create something out of nothing?ย Can you control the rain and cause it to fall in a different place away from its current path, or in the opposite direction to its course? If men were given control of the universe, they would be unable to hold that tremendous responsibility and would fight over it.ย 

Apart from this, arenโ€™t simple random acts of kindness miracles? A poor man able to get a job is a miracle. A woman showing countless days of rage who learns to control it so much that she always has a smile on her face is a miracle. A person whose heart has been broken so many times yet he still sees good in that person and forgives him dearly is a miracle. A shining light of justice in a world full of disgrace, dishonor, evil and corruption is a miracle. These common acts in our daily life, these acts of overcoming simple tests of faith are wonderful if seen in a different way.

So when you think that your life has no purpose and that there is no God to help you, look around, inside your house, outside your house, at simple things such as birds flying together in harmony and remember that the One responsible in maintaining the natural order of the Universe, the One who is expanding the Universe, the One responsible for all the beautiful creations and miracles in the world, is closer to you than your vein. He knows the hardships you face and loves you so much that He wants to help you so accept His help. Make an effort to be worthy of His Help. Believe in Him that everything happens for a reason, that what you are facing will not last forever and once it is gone, you will wonder why you ever worried in the first place when you had Allah with you all the time. So be patient during hardships and be thankful and humble during your good times.

Eid is a time to be thankful for all the blessings and joys Allah has granted us so let us make the most of them. If you do not feel thankful, then travel. Explore. Go to different places and learn different things. Last year I also went to the Northern Areas, Murree in Eid-ul-Fitr and Bhanjosa Lake in Kashmir in Eid-ul-Azha and honestly, it feels really good seeing nature at its brilliance during my trips to the Northern Areas. While you are travelling, focus on how everything is created, how a leaf produces food, how a butterfly emerges from a pupa, how people talk in different languages yet are united as brothers. Study every intricate detail you can and wonder how it is all possible. Then ask yourself:

โ€œIs there no God but Allah?โ€๐Ÿ˜

And see what response you hear.

Here are a few ayats in the Holy Quran from Surah Baqarah relevant to this:

And to Allah belongs the east and the west, so wherever you turn, there is the Face of Allah. Surely! Allah is All-Sufficient for His creatures’ needs, All-Knowing (2:115)”

“And those who have no knowledge say: “Why does not Allah speak to us or why does not a sign come to us?” So said the people before them words of similar import. Their hearts are alike, We have indeed made plain the signs for a people who believe with certainty.” (2:118)

May you all stay happy, blessed, hopeful, and joyful always and never despair of Godโ€™s Mercy and Grace.

Ameen ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

SubhanAllah Wa Alhamdulillah Wa La Ilaha Ilallahu Wa Allah hu Akbar ๐Ÿ˜

EID MUBARAK!!!

Well, my blog title says enough. I wish all the Muslims out there a Happy Eid Mubarak!!! 

May all the hardwork you put into Ramadan pay off,

 may all your sins be forgiven, 

may all your righteous deeds be accepted and enhanced by Allah, may you be content and happy by what Allah has given you in life, 

may you have the strength to bear all the hardships in life with vigour and faith,

May your faith never falter or diminish. May it strengthen by everyday

May you never despair of the Mercy, Grace and Love of Allah

May you and your families live a long and blessed life

Inshallah ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

& SubhanAllah, Wa Alhamdulillah, Wa La Illaha Ilallah Wa Allah hu Akbar for all the happiness, joy, struggles, pain, comfort and hope Allah has given me. May we all be proud Muslims

Ameen ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š


BUBBLE 4 – READING LIST

Yo, guys!! So, I’m a crazy book fanatic so I feel like sharing the list of all the novels I have read and plan to read (idk when that’s possible because there are so many books to read and i made a list of books i want to read but they got lost ๐Ÿ˜‘๐Ÿ˜‘ ). I want you guys to share your book lists here as well so I can see what interests you guys have. I like all types of book if there is a climax in it or like “life was perfect until……..” Not just a random chick flick regular life, unless it tells me a valuable lesson. And that the book does not center around romance like ugh….no offense but a book purely about romance just ruins the plot for me. I just skim across dozens of pages before throwing it away if it continues ๐Ÿ˜

So anyways, here it is:

  • Enid Blyton books (the books which have pictures and small tales for little kids, Famous Five, the Five Find-outers)
  • Mary-Kate and Ashley (the one where they solve mysteries and also about their regular life)
  • Aesop’s Fables
  • Matilda by Roald Dahl
  • Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl
  • Going solo by Roald Dahl
  • The Fault in Our Stars by John Green (i didn’t like this novel)
  • The Northern Lights by Philip Pullman (His Dark Material trilogy series, an AWESOME BOOK, A MUST READ ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ )
  • The Hunger Games trilogy by Suzanne Collins
  • To Kill A Mockingbird by …..(a good novel but a drag)
  • Rage of Angels by Sidney Sheldon
  • The Other Side of Midnight by Sidney Sheldon (an interesting but realy inappropriate novel, had to skim alot of pages. I gave up and read the last few chapters)
  • Divergent trilogy by Veronica Roth (wasn’t impressed by it, honestly)
  • The Mortal Instruments by Cassandra Clare (great series but also very dragged. But i do hate Clary ๐Ÿ˜‘ but Magnus & Simon are so cool!! ๐Ÿ˜)
  • Infernal Devices by Cassandra Clare (ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS SERIES ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ Loved every character in this series)
  • Forty Rules of Love by Elif Shafak (beautiful book ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜)
  • The Bastard of Istanbul by Elif Shafak (a drag and not so fun book)
  • Confessions of a Muslim girl by loveunconditionally on wattpad (LOVE THIS STORY AS IT WAS SO RELATABLE ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜)
  • Diamonds and pearl by Purityinmyheart on wattpad
  • The Ash Chronicles by loveunconditionally on wattpad
  • Battered, with love by loveunconditionally on wattpad
  • Project Muslimah by Niqabiundercover on wattpad
  • Defining a terrorist by Shona1993 on wattpad
  • The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini (beautiful book ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜)
  • A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini (soo beautiful i cried 2 times while reading it ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜)
  • A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens
  • Around the World in Eighty Days by Jules Vern
  • Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
  • The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho (i tried to understand what was going on in this but i couldn’t ๐Ÿ˜)
  • Veronica decides to die by Paulo Coelho (interesting book)
  • Percy Jackson series (awesome series)
  • The Hobbit by J.R.R.Tolkien
  • The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown
  • Angels and Demons by Dan Brown
  • Inferno by Dan Brown
  • Digital Fortress by Dan Brown
  • Deception Point by Dan Brown (all Dan Brown books are AMAZING!! ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜)
  • Anne Frank’s diary
  • The Harry Potter series (can’t say anything different about this one ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜)

Now here are the books I plan to read:

  • Daughter of Smoke and Bone and its relevant books
  • The Adventures of Tom Sawyer
  • The Reluctant Fundamentalist
  • Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
  • Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
  • Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
  • The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
  • The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
  • Eleanor and Park
  • Bane Chronicles by Cassandra Clare
  • The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown
  • Outlander by Diana Gabaldon
  • Game of Thrones series
  • After the Prophet
  • Rumi’s daughter
  • The Five people you will meet in Heaven
  • The Sealed Nector
  • The cuckoo’s calling

The list of future books to read is not much. It’s mostly classics I haven read yet but if you guys can recommend any, please do and also share your reading lists in the comments. I love discussing about books. Half of my life will pass by discussing about books ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…

Happy Reading!!

Allah Hafiz! ๐Ÿ˜Š